Originally written in April 2010
Recently the topic of dating again has come up, I don't even know where to begin. I was never very good at dating to begin with. As far as me dating again, I just don't see it happening. The last time I successfully dated a good man I was in high school - and yes, my dating history is really as pathetic as it sounds. I cannot imagine meeting someone, explaining my injuries, and then having someone subject themselves to the questioning, expectations, and the pressures from my friends and family. I think my friends and my family are amazing and anyone would be lucky to find themselves in the company of my homies... at the same time I know there is a defensive wall built around me and I don't think that many men will willingly scale that wall. I do know that it would be hard for me to trust again, hard to believe that someone will show up when they say they will, hard to rely on them to drive me from place to place safely, hard to believe that anyone would be willing to put up with the restraints of my head injury. I think that it would take a hell of a guy to make me feel safe, I think that I will be so much more cautious about who I let into my life now. I will have to truly believe that my safety and my comfort level will be carefully considered before I trust anyone with my well-being. I move more slowly than I used to, my voice is different, its hard for me to stay on the phone for any length of time, I have to concentrate much harder on simple things,etc. etc.. I guess as anything - time will tell. Wish me luck and hope for the best!
Recently the topic of dating again has come up, I don't even know where to begin. I was never very good at dating to begin with. As far as me dating again, I just don't see it happening. The last time I successfully dated a good man I was in high school - and yes, my dating history is really as pathetic as it sounds. I cannot imagine meeting someone, explaining my injuries, and then having someone subject themselves to the questioning, expectations, and the pressures from my friends and family. I think my friends and my family are amazing and anyone would be lucky to find themselves in the company of my homies... at the same time I know there is a defensive wall built around me and I don't think that many men will willingly scale that wall. I do know that it would be hard for me to trust again, hard to believe that someone will show up when they say they will, hard to rely on them to drive me from place to place safely, hard to believe that anyone would be willing to put up with the restraints of my head injury. I think that it would take a hell of a guy to make me feel safe, I think that I will be so much more cautious about who I let into my life now. I will have to truly believe that my safety and my comfort level will be carefully considered before I trust anyone with my well-being. I move more slowly than I used to, my voice is different, its hard for me to stay on the phone for any length of time, I have to concentrate much harder on simple things,etc. etc.. I guess as anything - time will tell. Wish me luck and hope for the best!
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